One day, after receiving the Lord and as I was resting in Him for a while, I had the tiny sensation that Jesus wanted to speak to me. But at first, in my fears, I rested the idea for a minute. But it soon melted away, and I thought to myself, “Well, why not?” So, I just came and listened. I heard in my spirit soon enough,
…the Lord beginning,
“I long to speak to you, My heart, My bride. Come and listen to my aching heart.”
I had not given Him proper time for journaling and listening for His voice for a while, back then—as days went by and I went on doing things that had to be done. I also was afraid to listen because of fear of deception, for whatever reason. It just hits me at times, and I mostly give in for a minute …or for some days. Jesus, noticing those fears of insecurity that I had, thinking that He was displeased with me because I did not listen to Him for a long while now…
He said,
“I am here to remain and continually love you. The battles have been trying, but I ever sustain you and bring you forth in growth. Painful lessons have to be met.”
Here he mentions the struggles I went through back then, around the time of “Battles of Emotions” [Laugh].
“And I trust you will pass them with my strength,” he said. “Oh, you truly are so frail, but I love your frailty for it allows me the chance to love you and show to you how strong I can be in you. With that comes a joy that the soul encounters at seeing and witnessing My faithful love—My faithful loving hand in action. It draws us closer.”
And, picking up on my thoughts about my constant pondering about how Jesus is always seemingly in pain, suffering, and wondering if it will ever stop.
Jesus said,
“My heart is aching and will ache as long as there is pain and suffering in the world—evil ever on the increase now. I wish to thank you, My little daughter, for coming to be with me in the comfort of an embrace. It helps me rest on your chest.
“You don’t need to be afraid to look at Me, truly, I see things differently. You are growing, growing in me. And yes, part of the growing involves seeing your misery more clearly and yet trusting plainly in Me, the source of mercy.
“Embrace me as you do—teach others to do the same so their love will be lavished upon me. I so long for them, I so desire to be held by them. In their arms, I am as a little toddler at rest in his mother’s chest, so at peace, he falls sound asleep and rests in the warmth of her arms and chest. I am that toddler. I am that child. And I need that embrace more than anyone could ever think.”
And the embrace that he is referring to is that, at times I take my Monstrance—which’s height is from my wrist to my elbow—not too big, not too little. I take my Jesus in the Monstrance and I embrace him close to my chest. I want to hug him at times and what more opportune chance to do that than through the Monstrance which holds Jesus’ physical presence? Sometimes, I hold him for as long as we feel like it. Him being close to my heart and I, leaning my chin on the monstrance itself—a cute hug for the time being. I tend to say to Mother Mary that I wish to hug Jesus, close to my heart. So, I say to her, “Momma, let’s hug Jesus together, you and I.” I ask for her help because perverted thoughts and temptations fly, and I could easily hug Jesus with the wrong sensations. So, Mother’s help is truly, indeed, helpful.
Jesus continued,
“I am wanting you near me as you are, in spirit and in truth. In the truth of who you are, both in my eyes and in My Mirror. Don’t restrain when you feel vague, don’t back away when there is no feeling when you embrace me. The vague feeling of dryness of emotions is in itself a love gift for me when you let it be as it is and still embrace me knowing it is very comforting to me despite how you feel. My heart still burns and is comforted, so don’t yield and desist.”
He then went on to a different topic, saying, a little bit cheered up..
“It's been a journey with us until now, and the good news is that we are about to launch off into a bigger one. I am honestly excited! So many things will come our way, both challenging and so much comfort! The battles will prove themselves so worthy as they shaped My beloved one, like gold in fire! Oh, my bride will rise up as a lioness, a lioness in fiery love. She will be like me; a lamb and a lion, meek and bold, submissive, and yet daring in a Holy way to pursue My wishes and desires, and the lost sheep.
“All the trial will make her into a beautiful diadem in my hands, fashioned exquisitely by My own hands. It will be interesting in the least, it will be challenging, but it will be fulfilling. As you walk in My will, you are fulfilled in your depths. Even if storms rage around you and toss you to-and-fro, deep down there is calm, there is a song singing ‘It is well with my soul.’
“Ah, so beautiful to gaze at you. Truly I do. I smile and rejoice, humming cheerfully at your every little step of faith—Oh I LOVE YOU!”
Then he hugs me around the neck and suffocates my face in his chest. He was overcome by love at that point.
..and I said,
You are so sweet, Jesus.
"I am sweet and desire to sweeten your days with me.”
I felt him being cheered up.
…and He continued, saying,
“You know, this IS a walk and journey together. Together is better than alone. When two are together there is a chance of laughter here and there. There is conversation and cheer along the path. Yes, there is also sacred silence and calmness, all its balance and time. But I see that many of my chosen ones walk the walk, in bitterness and sadness.
“There is no need for it to be like that because My joy can be your joy! And I want it to be your joy. Imagine at the end of your life you are in the bed and think to yourself of all that has happened. You would be thinking of the good moments and the joys you have had, in the storms even. You would say solemnly, but cheerful, at the memories, ‘If only I had enjoyed it more,’ not yielding so much to the sadness of the state of the world—of its decaying state. “So yes, switch your focus onto enjoying the Walk with me. 'Enjoy the flowers along the way…’”
And He is quoting Father Ezekiel. Father Ezekiel said to me, “Just smell the flowers along the way. Enjoy the walk, He already prepared everything. You just have to walk it with him and enjoy it. Do whatever He does, say whatever He says. If He does nothing and says nothing, then you say nothing and you do nothing.”
And Jesus continued…
“Remember the storm in the sea of Galilee, the waters were raging, the boat was threatened to be destroyed by its ferocity, but the water I stepped on submitted to my calmness and peace of soul and became stilled beneath My feet as I kept walking ahead in the storm. The storm was not in me. And this you can be because I am in you, and you are in me.
“Learn of me, as I am humble of heart."
I just pondered and I stopped a little bit at that moment, thinking to myself just how much peace, joy, love, and such an inspiration to actually enjoy the walk and not be so gloomy, came over me.
Jesus concluded,
“Smile more. For a smile is a healing gift to a soul, and to me. I love that smile you offer me!”
And when He said, “smile more”, I then recalled a word that popped up in my head one morning, saying, "Mother Smile, make her your own.” Interesting how the night before we had watched the movie of Saint Francis and how he called almost all as “brother” or “sister”—to the sun, to the moon, to birds. So, when I heard “mother smile,” I thought amused that it could be something St. Francis would be saying. [Chuckle]
Then I went and I pulled three Rhemas after finishing speaking with Jesus. The first one said:
"Challenge of the week: Be Grateful 😘"
The second one said,
"Put aside those fears, those uneasy broodings and qualms of conscience and those anxieties which can arise from our concerns to achieve holiness and salvation. . . Let us take good care not to get foolishly involved in all those fears and doubts, which, like paths leading nowhere, only tempt us to wonder on and on until we are hopelessly lost."
The third one said,
"You mustn't determine anything about yourself. Rather release yourself into My loving arms and forget about yourself. That's where real rest is." – Jesus
So, God bless, you guys. I hope you make Mother’s smile your own, and I hope that you will smile more. Enjoy the walk with Him, even if in storms. Make His peace be your own.